Beards and beer

How do I keep my beard out my beer?

How to keep your beard out your beer

Dear Dave
I have a big bushy beard. It’s magnificent. Been growing it since I sprouted the first wiry hair on my chinny chin chin. In fact, besides a few clean ups with the clippers, I've never even taken a razor to my face. Never sat down to pee, either. Problem is, I love drinking beer and I’m left with a foamy ring above my mouth after every sip. In fact, sometimes it gets so bad that I feel that I need to shout to the barman - Help, there's a beard in my beer! What should I do?
Regards,
Bronson

Bronson,

Have you considered shaving? No we’re only joking. We love us a good beard. In fact our resident beardo, Al, is to thank for every delicious DPBC brew and we think that like Samson his power comes from those fertile face follicles. Perhaps you should consider carrying a small DOP kit on your person? That way you can bring out a small compact mirror after each sip and use a facecloth to wipe away any foamy bits. Sounds arduous, because it is. Rather man up and just wipe your mouth with the back of your hand after every sip. Your flavour saver should be no concern for embarrassment. It's something worth celebrating and if it's as glorious as you say it is then you shouldn't even be paying for your own drinks man! Lesser men should see your face-fuzz as an invitation to buy you beer, beer that you should gladly accept. Beer that your beard deserves.

Cheers!
Dave

Dave’s a barman. Dave stays sober while you get drunk. Dave is part philosopher, part marriage counselor, part shrink and part priest. Dave serves them all. From guys celebrating the news that they’re going to be a dad, to the dude that just got laid off. You got a problem you ask Dave.

One Comment on “How do I keep my beard out my beer?

  1. I have never shaved since I first went to sea about a hundred years ago. My dark beard with a reddish ting got huge, I got married, it got whiter, it got shorter. In fact I was an early adaptor when it was first called “designer stubble”. I now drink beer without fear!

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